PEACE, LOVE, AND SPARKLES.

When are we ever going to start to treat people with respect? Everyone deserves that. We are all human and we all deserve to have that little shred of kindness. I have noticed that I have let myself be numb to this idea. It is easy for me to ignore someone when I don’t want to confront a situation. And well, I was recently on the receiving side of said ignoring technique. It hurt. For the first time ever… I WAS GHOSTED.

Yeah. Had I done it to people before? Absolutely. Did I think it was the best option at the time? Yes. What are my thoughts now? Well, let me tell you.

It may be difficult to confront someone and tell them you aren’t interested, but that will make things a lot better for the other person than suddenly dropping of the face of the earth and leaving them wondering what they have  done to deserve such treatment.

Instead of thinking how awkward or uncomfortable it would be to tell someone you rather be friends, PLEASE for the love of all things, just tell them. I promise, you will survive the conversation. If they don’t get it after telling them, by all means block them. That being said, that should be your last resort. Blocking should only happen if they have stalker tendencies or it is simply a toxic relationship you need to get out of.

I can’t explain how disappointing it is to be talking to someone ALL the time. EVERY day. Then nothing. I am not mad about it. It actually worked out fine because it opened me back up to new opportunities but it sure did sting. When one is ‘ghosted’ they are left confused, hurt, and yet somewhat hopeful. I am not sure how those things all align, but they do. I felt them all and then some.

I think the reason I now sincerely hate ‘ghosting’ is because it is such a selfish thing. Just be open and honest. If you aren’t feeling it they will have to respect that and if they don’t then good riddance. At least give them the opportunity to respect you and your decision to move on. I am sorry but the idea of you owing them nothing is STUPID. They invested in you. Even if it was just a couple of months, they still opened up and shared with you their life. You OWE them a simple conversation.

I don’t believe it needs to be a long drawn out conversation or a list of justifications for why you want to move on. Just tell them that you want to move on. Then they won’t keep hoping that you were just REALLY busy today and you will text them in the morning. Or that you got distracted and forgot to respond to their snapchat after you opened it. They will know, you aren’t going to text them. Yeah, that sounds harsh, but they will get over it much quicker than hoping and waiting for something that used to be so usual and normal- a regular (even daily) occurrence.

To the guys I have ghosted in the past, I am sorry. I am sad it took getting a taste of my own medicine to figure that out.

Let’s put an end to ‘ghosting’!