Nov 22, 2013

Peace, Love, & The LIST

Eventually this spot will be filled- here is WHO will fill it:

Every girl has a "list". We are trained from a young age to set the bar for our future husbands. I am a firm believer in having that bar of standards and knowing what your red flags are. But, I also know that we sometimes get a little extreme in our lists (ie. Tall, Dark, and Handsome- although valid- there is more to it).

I am afraid some women don't even give a second look to someone just because that guy is not her "type". If there is a red flag- that is a different story. I am speaking solely about the vain bullet points on our lists.(And I know men do this- if not more than women.) My readers tend to be a majority of women so- for you I write.

I am going to share my list with you, but I want to share some guidelines and examples I have found helpful in making my own list.

But also, do not expect perfection in your choice of a mate. Do not be so concerned about his physical appearance and his bank account that you overlook his more important qualities. Of course, he should be attractive to you, and he should be able to financially provide for you. But, does he have a strong testimony? Does he live the principles of the gospel and magnify his priesthood? Is he active in his ward and stake? Does he love home and family, and will he be a faithful husband and a good father? These are qualities that really matter.
-President Ezra Taft Benson, To the Single Adult Sisters of the Church, 1988

The Wife List: 10 Qualities

The Husband List: 12 Non-Negotiables

But how to make the perfect list?!

So before we start holding others up to scrutiny to see if they are worthy of us, maybe we ought to work first on becoming a “right person” for someone else.
- Choosing and Being the Right Spouse

For the life of me I cannot find the specific talk I was looking for. So, I will paraphrase it in my own words.

Make a list of who YOU want to become. As you become that person you will find a man who is either working on those same things or already possesses them. You have to meet someone else's standards as well.

If you want to marry the right person, you need to be the right person!

Here is my list:

1. He can take me to the temple.
2. He is a go-getter.(hardworker)
3. Service oriented.
4. He loves and respects his parents. (and siblings)
5. Attractive (this might be more important to some- and don't get me wrong it is surely important to me. Just not #1)
6. LOVES me for me- all the crazy included.
7. Plays into my hopeless romantic side.
8. Humble
9. Patient

Obviously I have the- will watch sports with me, loves the outdoors, a traveler, musically talented, hopefully cooks, etc. But those are my top ten. I am working on all of those continually- some I have conquered to a degree, but it's a never ending work in progress.


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