PEACE, LOVE, AND SPARKLES.

Over the last few months I've felt purposeless. I hate to admit this and feel almost silly saying it.
I fell into that stupid pit of self-loathing and doubt. I was at the place where you sit there and look for external validation from everyone around you that never seems to come. AND you forget you are the only validation needed.

NO ONE CAN GIVE YOU PURPOSE. YOU, ALONE, MUST FIND YOUR PURPOSE. (and when I say 'alone' I mean you and God.)

I am not sure there is much worse of a cycle to get stuck in than the never ending "why does nobody care about me" thought process. Does anyone notice I'm not around? Anyone care? Well, if I am being completely honest with you... I wouldn't care about me when I am in that negative head space. Who really wants to be around negative people for extended periods of time? It's exhausting.

There are so many factors I can blame. Seasonal depression, anxiety, stress, and the fact that I have a really comfortable bed. The mixture of a constant inversion, lot's of changes at work and new responsibilities, and what seems to be a full-on Elsa winter, but the reality is there is a solution. What is the key to happiness?

Willing service to others is a key to enduring happiness. President Kimball said: “God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another mortal that he meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other.” - Richard G. Scott, "Finding Joy in Life" May 1996

 I am blessed to have friends and family members who helped me snap out of it. The second I forgot about myself and got out there and served others the happier I was. It's a slow process and starts with small acts of service. Unfortunately, it doesn't happen over night even though I wish it did.

How did I get out of it?

1.  Friendly reminders that this wasn't me.
2.  Continued follow-up from friends and family on how I was doing. (Sorry if I didn't respond to you- I was being too self centered to see a hand reached out to me.)
3.  I made daily goals-- nothing too big.
4.  Every night I wrote down at least one thing I was grateful for.
5. I started going to the gym every other morning.
6. I bought a ridiculously expensive alarm clock. It simulates the sunrise and makes your room gradually as bright as day!  

*Note alarm clock on night stand* Also just wanted to show off Roxy. :)

Everything else seemed to fall into place while I was preoccupied accomplishing my list above. I didn't even notice when things seemed to change suddenly it was just better.

Everyone has their own path to happiness and finding their purpose. I can only share what helped me. Sometimes all we need is a reality check.

Also, I stumbled upon a blog post I wrote almost three years ago that goes hand in hand with this post. For a reminder that 'YOU IS IMPORTANT' go here.